Friday, May 25, 2018

Don't believe the hype: Jean Valjean

Where to begin? Well I guess attempting to explain what prompted this post would be a good place to start. Apologies if it takes forever for me to actually get to the main point. Good cummers are actually hard to find in porn, and harder to hold on to. Mythic figures like Peter North unfortunately succumb to the inevitable effects of time, and rising could-be stars like Winston Burbank (whom I still haven't properly released a blog post/page about) retire all too quickly. Jon Dough has been gone from this earth for over a decade now, and others like James Brossman also appear to be tapering down. So where are the new, next generation of decent spunkers in porn?

A couple years ago I made a rather popular post about the best popshots from the best cum slingers in porn, and even then people were writing comments to the likes of "what about Danny D? He does a mean ejaculation!", but when I did the original post, I was not aware of Danny D nor any other decent spermers (although I did start worker on a part 2 of that original post featuring Danny D amongst others, but even at that point some of the studs mentioned had already begun to retire!).

So obviously when most of the better ejaculators of yesteryears are gone, retired, or passed away, one tries to find newer flesh to try to carry on the torch. But much like most of the 80s and 90s studs, a good decent sperm cannon is hard to find in porn. What makes it even harder is how so many of these guys (and girls too, obviously) are turning to web-only scenes instead of appearing in actual porn "films", so that makes the attempt at finding and cataloguing these performers much harder to do. Nonetheless, seeing as how I am not the only porn hound out there who tries to hunt down proper semen slingers in their porn, I was able to get a handful of names from various other people's blogs and posts, and coupled with my own research from my own porn DVD collection, I was able to get a few guys' names which would be worthy to look into. Yes, no one can come close to Peter North or Manuela Ferrara or The Bross or even that 70s guy who looked like he did only 5 scenes but ejaculated more than a healthy, hefty dose of ball batter. But one must find alternatives to the "classics", because much like the situation of Jon Dough, once they are gone, there is no way to get any new material from them.

One of the guys whom I was brought to attention was a french import who pretty much works exclusively in the US market. Jean Valjean is a pornstar for the ages as he has that sustainability and dependability for what is required of him as a porn stud but also is quite the eye candy for the ladies from what I hear. In a world where for decades the vast majority of male talent was hired not for their looks as to make is seem that the everyday schmoe dude could bang these impossibly all too perfect to be real porn damsels, the often neglected but very limited niche market of porn for women was one of the only places where the male talent was actually above average in looks. And while Mr Valjean has enjoyed his fair share of notoriety in the women's porn niche market, it hasn't slowed down his own regular porn appearances. Just take a look at the porn film reviews: about one in three of his films are reviewed by women who rented that title because he was in it, much like most guys hunt porn featuring specific performers. So while Jean is both a pretty boy and a stud, he was also somewhat poised as an above-average spunker. At first I had no clue, which is why I looked into some of my own porn DVDs for scenes featuring the french import. 

And indeed, based on about two or three scenes I saw from some of my own porn DVDs in my collection, Mr Valjean was indeed quite a spunker! Not massively so when expecting big cumshots (as I mentioned earlier, we set ourselves up with expectations when we believe studs capable of impressive popshots), but well above average when compared to other more boring and so-called "average" semen spurters like Lee "Randy West for Y2K" Stone, Steve "Can Multiple Cum But Just Dribbles" Holmes and Kris "Looks Like I'm Gonna Explode But It's Always A Let Down" Knight. Armed with these little nuggets of Valjean examples, I was led to believe that here was a modern day porn stud capable of above-average decent popshots worthy of multiple re-viewings (Winston Burbank he isn't but no stud cums identical) which was worth it to start hunting down titles based solely on his appearances. 

(Above: UNRELATED: just a Jean Valjean clip found online, not in reference to those mentioned in this post)

And that is when I set myself up for disappointment. 

It did not take too long to realize that unlike guys like Peter North, Winston Burbank, James Brossman, and Ian Tate (to name a couple off the top of my head), all of whom have had their own fair share of semi-missed and below-their-own-average pops, can usually be counted upon to deliver the goods at pretty much (almost) all the time. But to my chagrin I discovered that Jean Valjean, like quite a few other "new" studs whom I will get to eventually, can not necessarily be counted on to deliver a good cumshot in most cases. If, say, 1 out of 10 times Manuel Ferrara blows a "dud", that is still a good 9 out of 10 really good cumshots. So a 10% disappointment rate is not really bad at all, especially considering the state of porn in general and the stress these performers have on set to deliver the goods.

(above: UNRELATED: Just a Jean Valjean clip I found online, no relation to those referenced in this post)

In the case of Jean Valjean, I will admit that it is mainly my fault I set myself up to be slightly let down. After reading review after review of various still available DVD titles, I allowed my own interpretation of reviewers' lingo to take precedence and influence my judgement in terms of what DVD titles to buy strictly on the prise of a good cumshot by Mr Valjean. It's a bit like buying an old porn title because there is one Peter North scene, only to have that Peter popshot turn out to being a dud (I'm looking at you, "Silver Seduction"). In this case, allow me to proceed with a few micro-reviews of just the Valjean cumshots from a few recently acquired DVDs which let me quite wanting, to say the least: 

"Hush" (Digital Playground)
Sc 01: Jesse Jane and Jean Valjean:
About three or so online reviews mentioned that Jean deposits a hefty dose of his spunk droppings into Jesse's open mouth. Now I am not a fan of "inside" cumshots as I am one of external explosiveness, but when the popshot is adequately filmed/captured, watching a few good cum missiles fired into an open mouth can be quite exhilarating. In this case, Jean only drops his spunk with almost zero celocity into Jesse's mouth. Yes, it is thick and white and you can see it all, but the force and power of ejaculation is missing. Quite simply, very disappointing!
Sc 05: Shay Jordan and Jean Valjean:
In this case, seeing as how the previous Jesse cumshot was a dud, a lot was riding on this one. And yes, while it is a most definite step up from the previous one, it just was not as explosive and climactic as it could have been. On the DVD's BTS footage there is another angle capturing the cumshot, and even with two angles, the shot is not up to what was expected. One large vocity strand opens up the ejaculation, the remaining ones barely shooting about a couple of inches if at that! By itself maybe it would have been a semi-decent, acceptable popshot but in combination with the utter fail of the Jesse scene, it just seems as though two out of two times is quite the fail on Jean's part

"Jack's My First Porn #9" (Digital Playground)
Sc 03: Veronique Vega and Jean Valjean:
Here is another perfect example of expecting great things due to a few factors: 1: the reviews, 2: the pairing, and 3: the one-scene only factor. First off, the reviews: those found online concerning this particular scene glowed at how it was very "substantial" sperm pop mostly landing inside and around Veronique's cutey-pie latina mug. Secondly the pairing: Veronique and Jean have done a few scene together which means there must be some kind of chemistry between the two and so maybe the sparks will indeed fly come scene's end. Thirdly, this being the only Jean Valjean scene in this film, then logic would dictate that if it's only scene of the day, the popshot should be as "big" as it can get. Well again, a bit of a dud, as the infamous "big" cumshot of thick white spunk is indeed directed principally to Veronique's waiting mouth, but it suffers from the Jesse Jane factor from the film "Hush": no real power or velocity! What we end up with is a creamy thick wad of goo but it is pretty much dropped into Ms Vega's mouth instead of being shot into. The result is, unfortunately, mostly disapointing.

"Valley Girls #2" (Madness)
Sc 01: Nikki Loren and Jean Valjean:
Take under consideration what I just said previously concerning the Veronique Vega scene. If this is Jean's only popshot of the day, then it should be as "big" as it can get. Alas, no matter how cute and spunk-worthy Nikki Loren is, and she is by far no slouch at all in the looks department, and no matter how turned on they both seemed to be with one another, we are left with a slightly disappointing popshot to her mug. It is quite sad considering how Mr Valjean was worked up as a decent-enough spunk shooter, especially seeing these duds one after the other.

(above: UNRELATED Jean Valjean with Joanna Angel clip. Nothing to do with the rest of this post!)

However not wanting to be the strictly pessimistic would-be failed critic of specific cumshots captured for porn posterity, I still have to make sure that when Jean does pop big, he really explodes like the best of them. I have seen a couple of scenes with Nautica Thorne where he seems to explode without control, as well as a couple of killer pops with Jenaveve Jolie  (although "Outcall Confessions #2" does fall in the serious dud category). So in trying to balance out the scales ever so slightly, here are a couple of cumshots from Mr Valjean which are both noteworthy as well as having a high replay factor:

(above: Another unrelated Jean Valjean clip, no reference to what I talk about in this post!)

"2 Fast For Love" (Metro)
Sc 02: Katja Kassin and Jean Valjean:
Like the Nikki Loren and Veronique Vega scenes described earlier, his pairing with german-born Katja Kassin is his only appearance in this film, which rides pretty high considering expectations. In this case, there is no disappointment at all as after a serious bout of fucking, he proceeds to plaster the lovely Katja's mug like it was his first Jackson Pollock painting attempt. Ms Kassin doesn't flintch at all even if Jean continues ro fire volley after volley of sticky cream straight at her face and mouth. Definitely a winner, one for the books and with very high strokability factor!  

"Rock Hard #3" (Vertigo)
Sc 03: Lucious Lopez with Jean Valjean and Tommy Gunn:
With the potential to go either way, it looks like the very Butterlicious Lucious Lopez provided a great deal of proper stimuli to Jean as at the scene's end he blasts her pretty face and mouth with a generous portion of powerful spunk blastings, to which the is no escape for Ms Lopez (not that she could find adequate shelter being almost point blank to Mr Valjean's one-eyed spunk shooter). Ms Lopez proves yet again she is a most under-appreciated performer in the porn world, as being the lucky recipient to Jean's sizeable load of choad is something to be re-watched and enjoyed time and again!

"Jack's Teen America #5" (Digital Playground)
Sc 05: Jayna Oso and Jean Valjean: 
Whoa, what to think, what to think? Jayna has seen more than her fair share of facial blasts from everyone worthy of being mentioned (Peter North, Lexington Steele, Jon Dough, Sasha, Winston Burbank, etc), and in this slightly (very slightly) bondage-light flavored scene with Jean, will she be graced with another good popshot to her pretty face? Well you bet she does! Although not as mind-bogglingly impressive as some of his other more explosive pops, Mr Valjean produces nothing short of an impressive pop to Jayna's waiting mouth and mug, which she expertly receives without any flinching whatsoever (I mean after you've been blasted by North and Burbank, I'm sure anything else would be a walk in the park!). As stated, not one of his most impressive, but one noteworthy regardless, which is why it should serve as what a "standard" Jean Valjean ejaculation should look like. And yes, quite a decent re-watchability factor! 

(above: another UNRELATED clip featuring Jean Valjean)

So there you have it my friends. Agree or not, it is up to you, and wether I made my point or not, it all boils down to my own personal opinion. But suffice it to say that I do believe that the "myth" surrounding the copious cumshooting ability of Jean Valjean is probably more fueled by his fans more than anything else, unless of course I got really unlucky and happened to stumble upon the "majority" of his "off days". Still, as I mentioned earlier, when the percentage of more so-so pops is close to being as equal or an important number in comparison to those good pops produced, maybe the title of superior cumslinger should be adapted to reflect the shortcomings as well. Stay tuned as I may also shed light on other "not so up to the hype" modern pop-shooters in more current-era porn (yeah I'm looking at you Kris Slater!).

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